The Back Story and the Throw Down

Some of you may know, I had significant weight loss success thanks to an awesome trainer and friend, Aaron Olejarz (www.innerfit.com). After losing 110 lbs. from July of 2009 to June 2010... yes 11 months... I did ok maintaining the weight loss. I did put some back on, but I was still happy, still heading to the gym a couple times a week, enjoying the occasional ice cream, basically enjoying life. I had plans to become a personal trainer myself. When I really started getting good at this fitness stuff, I was reading some statistics in one of the fitness magazines I had and saw that about 33% of American children today are obese. This was one of the reasons I wanted to be a trainer... well that and you can't be a very successful trainer if you aren't in shape yourself. It would force me to take care of myself. I had until December of 2011 to take the test, the problem was, the material wasn't coming easy to me. Anatomy and physiology are no easy tasks to learn.

Then, in October of 2011 I moved back out of the house and on my own. I could do (and eat) whatever I wanted. No one would care! The next month, I was asked by my job to help fill in at one of our other branches located up north, about 45 to 50 minutes away from my house. I was going to be managing my current department and taking on another branch. Needless to say, eventually I became stressed. My workouts suffered, my eating suffered, and my health started taking a nose dive. I was no longer preparing meals because, hey, McDonald's was right next door. I was eating out all the time and I told myself that it was ok. It was only for a season. Hey I lost a ton of weight before, I can do it again. I would get sympathy looks from my family and friends, yet I had an excuse for everything. Don't worry, I'll work it off... it's only 5, 10, 15lbs. December came and went and I didn't take my test. I'd failed.

One day while I was at work, I had to go downstairs for something. When I was coming back upstairs to my office, I sat down and noticed I was winded. I wanted to cry right there. What had I done?! That 15lbs. was now 30lbs. I texted Aaron and said that I was "sucking at life." After a phone call I decided that I could not do it on my own and so I joined Weight Watchers. I have done Weight Watchers in the past and have had some great success with it. It was the food accountability I was looking for with the scale that would tell me my success and hopefully only limited failures. The workouts weren't the issue; like I said, I learned some great things from the earlier weight loss. So the first week I lost 5.4lbs. The second week lost 2.3... and the third week gained about 3lbs. I was finding that I didn't want to keep track of those darn points! So after three months I quit. I decided I was going to do my own thing. Yeah, we know how well that worked out before.

Not long after I quit I had gotten a text from Aaron asking how I was doing... of course I got that text as I was walking in to Pizza Hut with my family. While I didn't tell him the Pizza Hut part (though he knows now) I told him I wasn't doing that great. I am quite sure by this time that I am a food addict. Apparently it took me 29 years to figure out. In no uncertain terms... he told me to cut the crap. That's one of the things that I like about Aaron; he could see through my excuses and he knows what I'm capable of because I've done it before. And so I did and I am now living happily ever after. HA! Yeah right. Ok, so yes I did get it right for a little while. I started walking up McIntyre ski area and really making smart choices about what I ate. I was losing almost a pound a day. And then after about 2 weeks, vacation came. I was determined that I was not going to let it derail me... heck I even brought my scale! So the first few days I did great, watching portions, not eating the smore's by the campfire... and then one night I just got tired of it. There was a delicious Mexican feast and I had more than I should have... and because the train was derailed, of course that meant I could do what I wanted for the remaining 3 days. And then of course when I got back I was technically still on vacation, I could eat more junk like Five Guys. And then it became like I was on auto-pilot. I would go to McDonald's, order the chicken sandwich meal and then get the sundae or McFlurry. It was like my brain wanted it and I couldn't say no.

And then came the day when I got on the scale and it said 200.8. I was back over 200. I couldn't believe it. All my excuses have lead me to this point and I know it. I was beginning to feel embarrassed when I would see people that I haven't seen in a while. It was almost like I could hear the thoughts. "Wow she's gained weight"

So today, August 24th 2012, I decided that I would go to the gym and while I was there, I got this great idea. I would throw down a challenge to myself. Do 50 miles a month (in any form) for 5 months to lose 50lbs. Now is 50 miles enough? I don't know, but I love competition... and who better to compete with than myself? My 30th birthday is coming up in March and I want to be healthy again. If I do it, I am going to reward myself with a vacation most likely to Spain.

I have started myself off with 2.64 miles on the treadmill. Tomorrow is the official weigh-in. While I'm not thrilled that you all have seen how much I've fallen, I am happy to hopefully have the support as I get back up. Follow me on my journey to see if Madrid is in my future. :)

Until tomorrow.
Becky